Find myself thinking all the time about these planets. How they effect my thinking, my feeling, my counseling. Meditation on rising and falling calms the attachment to ego, the desire for recognition. And yet…. human for a reason. Living through these volatile times for a karmic contract.
I like mentoring other souls – a lot. I yearn for a time and the space to create the drawings that I work on here and there. And yet, I want to write more than I want to paint. I want to paint more than I want to talk. I want to talk more than I want to study. I want to study more than I want to work. And yet…. I like my work. I meet students/alumni/artists all the time who want to sit and listen and watch me draw, write, paint, talk, study. Perhaps that is the heart of mentoring as we approach our cronehood time. Be ourselves. Share ourselves. Teach what we have learned. And let the others decide what to keep, and what to ignore.
There is this continuous image, of downloading the teachings of the Buddhist manadala wisdoms captured by the Rishi’s over time. Perhaps I will have the opportunity to study after all. And rock. And integrate.
I want to sit and listen more than I want to be acknowledged. Perhaps that is the first sign of progress.
Perhaps I am evolving after all.